Forgiveness?????

What constitute forgiveness? Is it enough for you to say I forgive you and

then what else. How do you then let go of the past and not carry it anymore.

I would want to know. Kung alam nyo paano gagawin yun o nagawa nyo na

then tell me how you did it.

I am so sick of people telling me to let go of what happened

and to forgive them. Even if alam nila kung gaano ka grabe ginawa.

Eto ang linya nila : "Forgive be a better person even if di nagsisi or di humingi

nang forgiveness. Mabigat dalhin yan " Of course I would give a cryptic reply

madali lang say o sabihin wala silang ginawa sa yo. The Next question

would be what happened? Ikaw naman tanga ka rin gusto mo manghingi

Ng opinion kuento ka rin. Tapos in the end they would still say the same thing

Forgiveness and Forget it. Hay sana masabi nilang gagawin nila yung

kung nangyari sa kanila kung ano man nangyari.

How I wish na di ko na dadalhin na kakalimutan ko na. Kasi I'm really

trying my best wag na isipin yung mga nangyari. Not for them but for me

pero when I see the damage that they have done eto na naman this anger

stirs inside me. Okay na ako pero nung nakita ko na naman sila.I felt it

again and when I confided to a tita about what I feel she dismissed what

I was feeling and immediately told me to forget the anger and forgive.

It's like I'm not entitled to my own feelings and my own anger.

Di rin kasi nakakatulong na maraming nakikialam.

What is even more irritating is that people seem to think that

since they are perfect and that because of that I should bow

down prostrate myself at their feet.

At dahil ganun sila ako na dapat ang magbigay , magpatawad

and be a bigger person. Some have gone as far to compare us

to them. Oh Lord nasusuka ako pag people start doing that.

Kasi di naman porke generous ka, mayaman ka, mabait ka or sociable

ibig sabihin mabait ka eh. You can hide your motives behind

generosity. Everything can be hidden beneath a façade.

What else is there to do confront them? Useless kasi they have

this weird habit of twisting your words and making you feel like

you're like a liar.

Sa mga nangyari kami na ang na-agrabyado kami pa

ang masama. Hate is a strong Word I know. But I don't want to

hate them but what I'm feeling is even worse Its indifference.

Sa dami nang damage na ginawa nila parang manhid

na ako. I'm starting to feel like I don't care and I mean

I really don't care anymore.

I'm being vague I know. I'm just so upset right now.