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Friday, May 23, 2008

Forgiveness?????

What constitute forgiveness? Is it enough for you to say I forgive you and

then what else. How do you then let go of the past and not carry it anymore.

I would want to know. Kung alam nyo paano gagawin yun o nagawa nyo na

then tell me how you did it.


I am so sick of people telling me to let go of what happened

and to forgive them. Even if alam nila kung gaano ka grabe ginawa.

Eto ang linya nila : "Forgive be a better person even if di nagsisi or di humingi

nang forgiveness. Mabigat dalhin yan " Of course I would give a cryptic reply

madali lang say o sabihin wala silang ginawa sa yo. The Next question

would be what happened? Ikaw naman tanga ka rin gusto mo manghingi

Ng opinion kuento ka rin. Tapos in the end they would still say the same thing

Forgiveness and Forget it. Hay sana masabi nilang gagawin nila yung

kung nangyari sa kanila kung ano man nangyari.


How I wish na di ko na dadalhin na kakalimutan ko na. Kasi I'm really

trying my best wag na isipin yung mga nangyari. Not for them but for me

pero when I see the damage that they have done eto na naman this anger

stirs inside me. Okay na ako pero nung nakita ko na naman sila.I felt it

again and when I confided to a tita about what I feel she dismissed what

I was feeling and immediately told me to forget the anger and forgive.

It's like I'm not entitled to my own feelings and my own anger.

Di rin kasi nakakatulong na maraming nakikialam.

What is even more irritating is that people seem to think that

since they are perfect and that because of that I should bow

down prostrate myself at their feet.

At dahil ganun sila ako na dapat ang magbigay , magpatawad

and be a bigger person. Some have gone as far to compare us

to them. Oh Lord nasusuka ako pag people start doing that.

Kasi di naman porke generous ka, mayaman ka, mabait ka or sociable


ibig sabihin mabait ka eh. You can hide your motives behind

generosity. Everything can be hidden beneath a façade.

What else is there to do confront them? Useless kasi they have

this weird habit of twisting your words and making you feel like

you're like a liar.

Sa mga nangyari kami na ang na-agrabyado kami pa

ang masama. Hate is a strong Word I know. But I don't want to

hate them but what I'm feeling is even worse Its indifference.

Sa dami nang damage na ginawa nila parang manhid

na ako. I'm starting to feel like I don't care and I mean

I really don't care anymore.

I'm being vague I know. I'm just so upset right now.

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Thursday, May 22, 2008

Cheap Thrills

I know that everyone has that right? I never ever think that someone or something is beneath me. I'm willing to try anything once except extreme sports and anything that involves heights.Here are some revelations about me:

I used to be a BIG Ariel Rivera fan. I mean really big that I would drag my friend Ginger to go see his movie with me. Parang napanood ko ata movie with matching iyak pa sa Ikaw kasi namatay sya dun. Nainis ako kay Regine kasi naghiwalay sila ni Gelli because she fooled around with Ariel. In hindsight na realize ko teka it always takes two to tango. I'm still a fan hey old habits die hard pero I just watch his telenovela's na lang.

I also do admit that I watch telenovela's sometimes sa channel 2 sometimes sa channel 7.

I watch tagalog movies. Some I criticize because of impossible story lines but I watch it anyway. Lately I'm trying to stop finding faults with the movie and just want to enjoy the movie.I now go inside in a movie house just wanting to be entertained.

I like going to comedy clubs. I know baduy pero Masaya sya talaga. Basta di ako ang lalaitin okay lang. haha!!!

The last time we went there was last Tuesday and The main performer for that night was Aegis. Nung una parang okay lang baduy pero okay na rin. Ang galing nila grabe ay sobra talaga. Parang walang ka effort effort kumanta. Ay ang galing talaga I can't say it enough ang galing ng Aegis. This is in no way a paid advertising I was really blown away kasi I never expected them to be that good. Kaya nung narinig ko sila hinanap ko

Ang songs nila na meron sa magic sing ang resulta masakit pa rin lalamunan ko up to now.


 


 

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Saturday, May 17, 2008

It's Over

My stint at the call center is over.
I resigned for reasons that I don't
want to elaborate on.

Time to move on to find another
job.Here we go and wish me luck.
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Tuesday, May 13, 2008

The Heat Is On

Tonight is my last night of extension.I really hope
makuha ko na ang score na kailangan ko. Tensed ako
kasi mapupunta lang pala sa wala pinaghirapan ko
if ever. Fight to the end na lang.If they say I didn't
make it then I'll be okay because I did my best.
I didn't quit saka madami namang work dyan na
puede applyan. Will blog about it either way.
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Sunday, May 11, 2008

Tapos Na Ang Training

Tapos na ang training namin di ko nakuha yung goal ko for this week
they gave me until Wednesday to reach that goal if not then its goodbye
na. Masaya ako kung makuha ko pero okay na rin kung hindi I'm really
starting to think if this is the right career for me.

Dami na rin akong callers na medyo sira ang tuktok pero
di ako affected sa kanila. If I can't find whatever it is
that they want me to find then what can I do.

Kakainis rin na marami kailangan i-sacrifice like
di naman ako makapunta sa scrapfest kasi galing
ako sa shift tapos wala akong tulog baka naman
mag collapse ako dun. Pero ganun talaga pag
magulang ka na everything as to take the a back
seat
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Tuesday, May 6, 2008

OJT Day 2

Hayyy Grabe!!! Day 2 na just when I thought na
okay na and I'm getting the hang of it.Ms Splenda
hands me a sheet of paper detailing some of the
mistakes and areas of improvement. Aminado ako
kasi kasalanan ko talaga sya. Kaya lang naiinis lang ako
kasi why couldn't they catch me at a good time.
I need to make 10 perfect calls na sunod sunod when
they do monitor me to be able to graduate from OJT week .
If not ma extend ako ng 1 week then pag di pa rin.
Maghahanap na naman ako ng work. Hayy sana makalusot
if not okay lang din kasi it just means its not meant for me.
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OJT

OJT week na namin medyo tensed na kaming lahat.
Kakapagod 7 hours of talking pag uwi ko super
pagod na ako. May ibang callers na mabait,
may naiirita at higit sa lahat may bastos din.

Kaya please to all my friends in the US
na gumagamit ng 411 please be kind to the
operator. Baka ako yung nakakasagot sa
inyo. (hahahaha!!!)
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Saturday, May 3, 2008

Work Stories

Finally nag work na rin ako.. Nung una parang di ako
sure na mag work ako uli kaya lang tinatamad naman
ako kung sa bahay lang. I needed to do something
productive so I applied in a call center and got accepted.
Training was really great people are great most of our trainers
are nice.Except for one let's just call Ms.Splenda (artificial sweetener).
Nakakainis kasi talagang nanghihiya sya ng mga
trainees.I know malalaki na kami at di na dapat
isipin ang feelings namin pero grabe namamahiya sya.
It's like she derives her satisfaction from being so mean.
Yung isang trainer namin na guy lets just call him
Mr. Bear mabait pero minsan nawawalan sya ng
patience pero di sya namamahiya kung napapagsabihan
ka man nya you will understand kung bakit. Unlike
her talagang dahil ka nya feel sorry ka na lang. Pero
ito pa nakakainis she has her favorites. Pag may violations
ka na written dapat bigyan ka pero sa iba lalo na
pag gusto ka nya di ka nya bibigyan.Pag di ka gusto
makaka derive pa sya ng satisfaction sa pagbibigay ng
violations. She's like a freaking MMDA everyday may
biktima ng violations. Maski di mo sinasadya sorry
ka di kita feel therefore may violation ka.
Saka during one of major activities where as you will
make a call and a trainer is listening. Sinisigawan nya
yung trainee nya. A co-trainee even said he didn't
have an Irate caller but what he had was an Irate
trainer.

Kahapon dalawa naging biktima nya.
Two of my friends were kicked out
of the program because of her.
Binagsak na nya nilait lait pa nya
I don't really mind kung constructive eh
kaso di naman. Eto pa this week sya pa
rin ang trainer ko. Help me!!!
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Friday, May 2, 2008

Adrianne at 5 Months

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My photo
Makati, Philippines
The name that dare's to be different. I love you too don't you know.